I've been trying to write this post for three weeks now, but each time I start, I stop. It's been weeks, but the rejection still stings a bit. As you can tell by the title, this isn't a very happy post, but it's real life. Last month, I got rejected from my dream school. You see, I thought I had automatic admission, but it turns out being in the top 7.6% of your class bumps you to top 8%, and UT needed top 7% for auto admit. I found that out late in the game, but I thought surely they'd accept me- I was only .6% away. I was wrong. Now, I wasn't completely rejected- I got offered an admission decision saying that I could transfer to UT Austin after spending one year at one of their other campuses in the UT system. At first I was excited, that could work, I could go to UT Arlington for a year, then transfer to Austin, no big deal, I had already gotten into UTA and I was offered a pretty large scholarship; it could all work out, right? Wrong. As it turns out, if I wanted to accept the scholarship to UTA, I couldn't be apart of the CAP program that would allow me to transfer to Austin after a year. I was torn between finances and dreams, and as it usually plays out, finances won. I had to decline the CAP offer and accept admission and my scholarship to UTA.
Just like that, my plans for the future had to be adjusted. I've dreamed of going to Austin for five years, but now it's pushed back. I was so excited to move to a huge city full of music and culture, but now I'm stuck in Arlington, a smaller city and only 45 minutes from home unlike the four hour distance between home and Austin. It's not necessarily that I want to get away from home, but I want to get out into the world and start becoming my own person. I thought that once I got into college I could leave everything from my life behind and meet new people and have new experiences. I also thought that it would be easier to cut ties with people from home whom I don't like, or are just crappy friends in general. Also, being out is easier in college, especially if you're in a huge city, and the most liberal place in Texas. I was so sure that I would get in that I even went ahead and started mapping out what classes I was going to take and I started looking at syllabuses and professors at UT Austin. It's not like I'm never going to Austin, because I definitely plan on transferring after a year or two, but it's the setback that hurts more than the rejection. You know how you plan your life and you imagine it going a certain way, and it feels safe? That's what I had. Now, my life plans seem to be tossed into the air, and they're just hanging there, waiting until I figure it all out.
To be truthful, I know there's probably a reason why I didn't get in, and it will all work out in the future, blah blah blah, but for now, I just want to be sad for a bit, because it's perfectly valid to be sad about this. I know this may seem a bit dramatic, but for me, the life I've planned has been altered a bit, and I don't like that. Thankfully, I was offered a large enough scholarship for UTA that I will have very little expenses, since it will cover most of my tuition fees, and that's without any grants/loans from FASFA and the like. Now, I'm stuck deciding between living on campus and living the typical college life, or staying at home and commuting to save money. As for that, only time will tell, as my indecisive ass isn't going to decide yet, but I know this is just another bump in the road of life.
I know I'm not alone in this process, since thousands of kids get rejected from universities each year, so I thought I would compose a list of things that have helped me feel better about the whole situation, and that will hopefully help you if you're someone facing some setbacks in life at the moment.
1. Cry
It's perfectly acceptable to let yourself feel these emotions. You may feel overwhelmed and disheartened, but that's okay. These feelings will eventually fade, and it will all be okay once it's over. But for now, go ahead and let the tears fall freely.
2. Talk about it
Having someone you trust to talk about anything with is a super important thing. For me, I usually turn to a few close friends and/or my mom. No matter what, you're never alone. If you feel like you truly don't have anyone, I'm always ready to listen to anything you're going through. You can leave a comment below or hit me up on one of my social links to the right or above, and I'll always listen. You're not fighting this fight by yourself.
3. Allow yourself time to be upset
You don't have to pretend the rejection doesn't hurt. Allow yourself all the time you need to be upset. Just remember that it won't last forever, and eventually the fog will clear.
4. Start making plans for your new future
Look into other schools you got accepted to and start imagining yourself there. Look into the area surrounding the school and start planning your next step in life.
5. Realize you're going to be okay
No matter what happens, you're going to make it through this. It might seem like the world is crushing you, but it won't crush you forever. Eventually, things are going to start looking up again.
Everyone faces rejection in their lives, and this probably won't be the last time you're rejected from something, but the pain won't last forever. Although I'm still bummed that I didn't get into my dream school, I know that it won't stop me from kicking ass in Arlington until I make my way to Austin. At the end of the day, you hold your life in your own hands, so do whatever makes you happy.
~Maddison
Just like that, my plans for the future had to be adjusted. I've dreamed of going to Austin for five years, but now it's pushed back. I was so excited to move to a huge city full of music and culture, but now I'm stuck in Arlington, a smaller city and only 45 minutes from home unlike the four hour distance between home and Austin. It's not necessarily that I want to get away from home, but I want to get out into the world and start becoming my own person. I thought that once I got into college I could leave everything from my life behind and meet new people and have new experiences. I also thought that it would be easier to cut ties with people from home whom I don't like, or are just crappy friends in general. Also, being out is easier in college, especially if you're in a huge city, and the most liberal place in Texas. I was so sure that I would get in that I even went ahead and started mapping out what classes I was going to take and I started looking at syllabuses and professors at UT Austin. It's not like I'm never going to Austin, because I definitely plan on transferring after a year or two, but it's the setback that hurts more than the rejection. You know how you plan your life and you imagine it going a certain way, and it feels safe? That's what I had. Now, my life plans seem to be tossed into the air, and they're just hanging there, waiting until I figure it all out.
To be truthful, I know there's probably a reason why I didn't get in, and it will all work out in the future, blah blah blah, but for now, I just want to be sad for a bit, because it's perfectly valid to be sad about this. I know this may seem a bit dramatic, but for me, the life I've planned has been altered a bit, and I don't like that. Thankfully, I was offered a large enough scholarship for UTA that I will have very little expenses, since it will cover most of my tuition fees, and that's without any grants/loans from FASFA and the like. Now, I'm stuck deciding between living on campus and living the typical college life, or staying at home and commuting to save money. As for that, only time will tell, as my indecisive ass isn't going to decide yet, but I know this is just another bump in the road of life.
I know I'm not alone in this process, since thousands of kids get rejected from universities each year, so I thought I would compose a list of things that have helped me feel better about the whole situation, and that will hopefully help you if you're someone facing some setbacks in life at the moment.
So You Got Rejected, Now What?
1. Cry
It's perfectly acceptable to let yourself feel these emotions. You may feel overwhelmed and disheartened, but that's okay. These feelings will eventually fade, and it will all be okay once it's over. But for now, go ahead and let the tears fall freely.
2. Talk about it
Having someone you trust to talk about anything with is a super important thing. For me, I usually turn to a few close friends and/or my mom. No matter what, you're never alone. If you feel like you truly don't have anyone, I'm always ready to listen to anything you're going through. You can leave a comment below or hit me up on one of my social links to the right or above, and I'll always listen. You're not fighting this fight by yourself.
3. Allow yourself time to be upset
You don't have to pretend the rejection doesn't hurt. Allow yourself all the time you need to be upset. Just remember that it won't last forever, and eventually the fog will clear.
4. Start making plans for your new future
Look into other schools you got accepted to and start imagining yourself there. Look into the area surrounding the school and start planning your next step in life.
5. Realize you're going to be okay
No matter what happens, you're going to make it through this. It might seem like the world is crushing you, but it won't crush you forever. Eventually, things are going to start looking up again.
Everyone faces rejection in their lives, and this probably won't be the last time you're rejected from something, but the pain won't last forever. Although I'm still bummed that I didn't get into my dream school, I know that it won't stop me from kicking ass in Arlington until I make my way to Austin. At the end of the day, you hold your life in your own hands, so do whatever makes you happy.
~Maddison
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